Thursday, December 22, 2011

What Spiritual Looks Like

This blog post about my work with my spiritual gangster and clairvoyant healer Kindra Gans--bomb dot com girl-and getting through this crazy "break up" thingie. It was originally posted on where it took on a life of it's own and became a Blog We Dig the week I posted. 

At the end of September/the beginning of October, I was becoming a little too well acquainted with the fibers that make up my carpet after one too many nights balled up on the floor crying myself sick. In my darkest moment I cried out for some kind of help, because I knew there had to be a better way and a few weeks later the universe answered my call when my co-worker gave me the info for a psychic she'd just met on the set of a photoshoot. Initially skeptical I took the information and was surprised when I found myself dialing her number during my lunch break the next day and setting up and appointment for the minute I got off of work. I needed healing and answers and as far as I knew she had them.

On the 10 minute drive from work to her office I felt my heart racing. I kept replaying the last and only time I'd ever seen a "psychic" in my life and knew that if this went anything like that did, I would be wasting my time and money. You see the last time I saw a "psychic" was almost ten years ago when i was a freshman in college and someone brought in palm readers for a program on campus. These dark haired, vaguely middle eastern women had rings on every finger, layers of necklaces, dark chiffon tops, and basically looked like Kim Kardashian meets Stevie Nicks with a thick accent. They didn't tell me anything worthwhile and one tried to get my friend to pay her $300 to remove a dead fetus from her or something like that. Anyway, I was completely prepared for this girl to be a bit full of it when I went to see her but a tiny voice kept pushing me--a tiny calm voice and my intense desire to never let anyone down.

I parked my car in the lot in front of her offices and was surprised to see a very beautiful, normal, well adjusted 20 something meet me at the door and walk me back to her room. This girl was NOT the psychic I was used to. her office was devoid of spooky strange stuff, like beaded curtains and scarves over the lamps, and was super normal. There was a desk, office chairs, a few pictures on the wall, her degree and certificates for completing training as a clairvoyant healer. I sat across from her and without telling her too much she read my soul and saw me broken and weeping on the floor. She also saw a lot of  other things and told me everything I needed to know to begin taking the right steps to heal myself. I left feeling uplifted and knew that this situation would not kill me but that it would make me stronger.

From there I did what any normal person would do, I went home and Googled this "healer" and was a little surprised at what I saw. This super spiritually connected girl who radiated love from the inside out was talking about drinking beers at night, had pictures of her and her pals out on the town on facebook and even outed her fears of recently moving to Atlanta from San Diego and how difficult it can be to introduce yourself as an energy healer to people at networking events and one first dates. In short she was your typical 20 something, scared shitless by somethings and super confident about pretty much everything else sometimes. She was for sure was no fortune teller, nor an angel, and was far from the blissed out spiritual gurus that I thought would be hooked up to a higher power. She was a girl just like me trying to keep her shit together and using her extraordinary gift to support herself. Hmmm... The judgmental ego voice inside me whispered "You cannot trust this girl or anything she said. She's too normal and has fears and doubts and isn't any more enlightened than you are." Then a strange thing I happened, I ran into a former client turned friend of mine at the mall and we began to talk about spirituality and I told her about my healer and how she reminded me of Kendra Wilkinson (yes that Kendra from E!). She told me that just because someone has a life and a past does not discount their gift or mean that they do not have a message for you. I sat with that for a while. Then in the next few weeks I sat back and watched several things unfold pretty much exactly the way she told me they would. Soon, I made another appointment, and another, and one for my friend, and one for my mom and gave her info to my coworkers who went to see her and a former coworker who broke down in her office after she read her from head to toe in one meeting.

 Just because she has fears, says FFFF, meets guys at bars, has a hard time answering the question "What do you do?", drinks green tea for breakfast and beer for dinner and lives like every other girl under 30 that I know, does not discount any of the guidance she has given me--which has been spot on--nor does it mean that she is not spiritually hook up. Not every spiritual person is a monk and not every hot girl you meet is vapid and shallow. Sometimes your best spiritual running buddies are spiritual gangstas who read Deepak and listen to Jay Z while they do it.

 The added moral of this story is never ever judge a book by its cover, or better yet never ever judge.

 If you want more info on Kindra, check out her blog. It's funny, cute, full of advice on debunking the myths that swirl around psychics and info on how to connect with her. Although she's based in Atlanta, she does readings over the phone as well.

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